Lessons from Offering Help Without Charge

                                                         

I’ve discovered a paradox: when help is offered freely, many dismiss it; when a high fee is attached, people suddenly perceive value. Parents often post desperate pleas for guidance, yet when genuine, no‑strings‑attached support is extended, they hesitate or disappear.

 

This experience has made me question whether the barrier is trust, perception of worth, or simply the noise of social media. Whatever the reason, I will no longer chase after those unwilling to engage. My time is better spent deepening my own knowledge, reading widely again, and continuing my advocacy in ways that reach those truly ready to listen.

 

Sometimes, the most valuable lesson is knowing when to step back.

 

On 8.1.2026 I started teaching a 7th grade girl from Ohio. I did 2 zoom meetings with the parents and the student to their satisfaction. This was completely free of charge. She was the only student whom I taught despite stating that all advice and tuition will be free of charge. I made this offer for over a year.

I then decided to say that there will be no fee charged and one may pay what one likes after their child is able to read. I started this early this year after the student from Ohio. Despite this not a single person accepted my offer. This is despite me stopping scrolling Facebook and other social media and only concentrating writing on Facebook websites for dyslexic help.

Here is a sample:

January 29, 2026.

Good Day Luqman

Apologies for the private message.

I'm from South Africa.

I have a 13 year old son with Dislexia and they diagnosed him with ADHD.

He has so many school struggles, what can I do as a perant to help him

Regards

Monique

I immediately replied:

Good Day Monique. How about a Zoom meeting at a convenient time? This will be the best way. I am in Sabah, Malaysia and it is 3.25 am here now. Fix a time between 7am and 7 pm Malaysian time

Monique read my message but did not reply.

I saw a desperate request from Kristina Friedrich-Jarembek on Facebook and responded and then messaged with the following:

Google my name and please let me help you. No fee will be charged and if you want to pay anything you may do so after you are satisfied.

Then came one Shannon Arsen and several others with a similar post on Facebook. I responded and then sent a message through messenger. Not one of them accepted my offer.

Are these people genuinely interested in wanting help, I wonder?

So, perhaps as many friends had advised me, I should charge a hefty fee which they will consider to be worthwhile.

I have decided to stop wasting my time and start reading a lot of articles I have stopped reading for over a year.